(59) Inner Strength is About Saying YES, not ACTING Strong.
- Daniel
- Dec 13, 2018
- 3 min read
Updated: Jul 26, 2023
The playoffs were over and we were at the front door when Kenny asked, “You’ll be here for the big game?”
The answer died in my throat. “Where did this come from?” I asked.
Kenny turned from the heavy rain and said, “I have an umbrella right here.”
“No, it's okay," I said. "My car is close.”
In fact, my car was two blocks away, and I was completely drenched as I finally ducked into the seat. Shivering, I had to stop myself from turning on a cold heater. I felt so angry.
Saying No to offers of help was something I had been doing a lot lately: at the company picnic last week, I was feeling cold and said No to a sweater; later, feeling tired and even colder, I rejected a ride back to my car, saying, “No, it's just up ahead” (it was a football field away); and yesterday, at a lecture, I said No to the offer of a chair (and the young woman who offered it was beautiful!).
By the time my car's heater warmed up, I was almost home. And there was no place to park. Once more, I found myself running through the rain.
As I slammed the door, my roommate looked up and said, “Washing your clothes while wearing them? What would your mother say?”
He added, “I'll heat the coffee.”
Hot coffee sounded good, and I found myself saying, “No thanks, not right now!”
I thought, Again!? Is it so hard to accept a simple offer?"
With a rush of embarrassment, I realized the answer had something to do with looking strong. If so, did people really see me as strong when I rejected their help; or did they see me as I was beginning to see myself; as the village idiot?
I suddenly stopped, pants half on, as I realized, "Trying to look strong means being uncomfortable. Always".
As I finished dressing, I decided to say Yes to the next offer. How hard could it be?
The next morning, I hit the snooze button too many times and missed breakfast. At work, the newest hire pointed to a box and said something about extra donuts. I smiled and shook my head No.
And then shook my head again, disgusted with myself. I thought, “What is the problem?”
The night of the big game finally arrived, and I spent a fun evening with friends.
When I opened the door to leave, I yelled back at Kenny, “What is it with your house and the rain?”
He walked up, glanced out at the downpour, and laughed. The storm was not supposed to hit until morning.
“I still have that umbrella,” he said with a grin.
Halfway down the steps, I stopped. Rain began trickling down my neck. I took a deep breath and let it out with a groan. Forcing myself to turn around, I went back and knocked on the door.
After a moment, Kenny opened it. He laughed and said, “It’s right here.”
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